I have made it easy for you. Through August 29, use the code word AugustCalltoAction and the Clarity Call is yours, compliments of Love Starts with Me.    

Well, as a lifelong salesperson and as a coach, I am done using that “formula.” You know why? Because it is a lie. We may or may not have fully known it was a lie at first.  We certainly wanted to believe. I have been on the purchaser side and on the sales side of that equation.  My experience from both sides shows that it simply isn’t true.

The truth? Well, the truth is that it is your fault. You have created the situation, whatever the situation is. You have created, allowed, enabled, dwelled upon and accepted the circumstance that you now bemoan. Your thinking, actions, processes, dysfunction of some sort and/or lack of attention have caused this.  That is actually good news.

My letting you off the hook and leading you to believe that my product or service is magically going to fix your world without a thorough examination of the thinking and actions that led to this place and a full willingness to release the old ways is a disservice to you and to me and to your entire world.

Can I help you? You bet I can. IF and when you realize that you got yourself into this and that you can get yourself out of it – with awareness, willingness to change and the proper support.  And not under any other conditions.

Doing nothing does nothing but take you deeper into your current issues. Blaming anything or anyone, making excuses, looking for scapegoats and rationalizing your position will not help you. In fact, it will hinder you in making progress. It will keep you stuck. So whether it is your old vendor or your husband or your boss or whatever, the change doesn’t start there.

Those are nice, easy outs for us when we are fearful of the truth. Not accepting help when it is right in front of you also shows that you aren’t ready to face the truth. You SAY you are ready for a better life, a better love. Your actions show something different. That is okay. We each have our own path. Lord knows I have done it in my own life.

Let’s consider getting real with ourselves, though. If we aren’t ready, let’s see it, admit it and accept it. Let us know it and be okay with it at least for now. Let us not deceive ourselves by saying we are and then not acting accordingly.  Let’s love ourselves enough to face the truth without judgment or condemnation.

If we truly are ready then let us not stand for any more delays or distractions.

It is your choice.

The change, the transformation, the CREATION of a new and better way starts in one place. It starts with the only thing you can or should control. It starts with you.

It was a pretty emotional and heartfelt request.

As I was praying, a small thought (freddy thought – fear based, negative Nellie thought) passed through my head. What?! What are you doing?

You know you are gonna get it now.

Why yes, freddy, I will and do. And today, I did.

I am so very, very, very grateful. I am in the midst of a huge personal breakthrough. I have moved into a new awareness that cannot go “back in the bag.” The wonderful thing is that now it can be healed. Once and for all.

That is one huge benefit of being a Transformational Love Coach. I myself continue to transform and grow in love. I continue to seek and allow the process. It’s kind of required when you help facilitate this for others.

When we close off we begin to die, little by little. When we settle for status quo, we are moving backward for the world keeps turning, growing and expanding. When we open up, we live at levels we have never seen before and it just continues to get better and better.

I walk this path. I live this myself. I am here to guide you when you are ready.

When we get quiet and become still we can slow ourselves enough to hear our inner voice. This is no longer natural for most of us. Oftentimes, we are moving along on autopilot and living in reactive mode.

Our husband does X so we react by doing Y. Our boss says A so we go into B mode.

It doesn’t have to be this way. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. It doesn’t have to be act and react automatically. We can be purposeful and mindful. We can set the stage and create the marriage and career we choose if we decide to do so.

We can begin to tap into the inner wisdom that we each have. We can be guided by our conscious thoughts and actions rather than our emotions and reactions.

How? By building the proper foundation.

My class, The 5 Week Love Foundation Online Program, starts August 4. We are going to put in place the infrastructure to allow you to live and love your life on purpose. If this resonates, learn more here.

We had Week Two of the live 5 Simple Secrets webinar on Tuesday, building on what we started last Tuesday in Week One. Follow the links to hear the webinar replays. We talked more about how we can literally transform our current relationship into something we hardly recognize. In a GOOD way!

I also introduced my new web program, The 5 Week Love Foundation Online Program. I am so excited to get started live August 4. I welcome you to learn more and ask your inner spirit for guidance as to whether it is right for you.

Today, I decided to add a bonus for anyone who signs up by midnight Monday. I am offering a live one on one call with me as a special thank you for those who purchase the program prior to it beginning. This time with me will help you kickstart the transformation of your relationship.

Although most of the women who participated in the webinar series are married, these principles apply to anyone, in any stage of coupling or even uncoupling.

I look forward to continuing the journey with you, whatever path you decide to take.

My wonderful, fabulous, creative and fun-loving husband suggested we go to Disneyworld. What?! Uh, yeah, I don’t think so, I thought. I was a grown ass woman, after all. A professional. A type A rising star in the corporate world.

We didn’t have kids. Why on earth would we go to Disney? And what would people think?

Well, he talked me into it. With some help from one of my good friends who was a travel agent at the time. She explained that there was much to do and it wasn’t all kiddie stuff. I was, to tell the truth, a little less than 100% jazzed about it.

Until we got there.

We rode the bus to the resort, which was not really my cup of tea but it was part of our package. We got there and the line to check in was long but moved quickly. The resort was absolutely stunning. The grounds were lush and green and well tended, more so than even the top resorts where we stayed in Jamaica. I couldn’t believe how well themed it was. I felt like I was in another country. Everything was clean, sparkly and beautiful. Perfect.

We entered our room, which I imagine many other families had called home for a time. I was so pleasantly surprised that it looked immaculate, clean and new.

I was in a stressful job at the time, with lots of growing workload and responsibility. On top of that, we were going through a merger and much was up in the air. We didn’t know who would be doing what or which company would have control. I was a top performer so I knew I would be okay but would it last under the new regime? As a top performer I saw that I had more to lose, really. Where I would land in this and what boss would I have? Would we gel like I did with the one I had, who I loved – the boss that loved me?

None of that mattered here. None of that could reach me. I was in my newfound happy place.

We are unique beings and it is important to be separate at times so that we come back with more to bring to the table. It doesn’t mean that you love him any less or vice versa. It simply is another facet of ourselves to nurture and expand.

It also conveys respect and trust when you support him to do the same.

Sometimes you get into a comfort zone and start coasting along. You think that it is a nice, safe place to be. You think that you could just rest here forever or at least until “when.” When this is in place or when that happens or when the kids are this or that, when I am this size or after the holidays…and on and on. It’s not that bad, after all.

Then something comes and shows you the truth. That it is neither safe nor comfortable in this place but an ever increasing dimming of your own light, a slow and steady slide into invisibility and conformity.   You have become one of the faceless masses. You have become a shell of your true self.

Does that describe you in any way? It did me in my marriage. It also described me in my job.

I was one of the lucky ones. I paid attention when the boulder was dropped on me showing me the truth. I woke up. The smoke cleared from my eyes and I saw everything in a new way.

I created a new life for myself brick by brick, habit by habit. Now my life is nothing like it was before and I am happier than I have ever been. I have a system to ensure that there is no more slow fade and that I am making forward progress even in what looks like sidetracks or backtracks from the outside.

I share my system with those other lucky few who recognize the weight of the pile of rocks they are carrying now, or sometimes, those who are ready to crawl out from underneath the boulder like I once had to.

I work with women who are ready to transform their relationships and lives into something they once only dreamed possible.  I show them how to build the foundation including the mindset.

If you are ready, let’s talk. I have made it easy for you. Through August 29, use the code word AugustCalltoAction and the Clarity Call is yours, compliments of Love Starts with Me.

That is great stuff! It helps us do more, be more and accomplish more in many ways.

It also distracts us more than ever. We have so much incoming data at our fingertips that it is easy to forget that we live in a real world not just a virtual one or a social media one. All this technology allows us to hide more than ever before. Hide from real connections, from our families, friends and husbands.

It even allows us to hide from ourselves more easily than ever. We do not have to be present with our spouse, our friends or even ourselves when we can simply look at our phones for the next “hit” of quick information and distraction.

The question is what is this costing us? What is it doing to our most intimate relationships? Do we know our husbands and do they know us? Or are you two individuals that happen to be in the same house each staring into the phone screen?

Do we know ourselves? Do we know what we desire? What we are working toward and what we like? Are you listening? To him? To your higher self? To your Maker? Isn’t it time to start again? I say yes and amen and I am committing now.

Listening is one of the topics I cover in my new free guide The Relationship I Love Starts with Me – 5 Simple Secrets to create the relationship you’ve been longing for. Don’t yet have it? You can get it here.

I am also doing a free webinar series on the topic and the next class is Tuesday, July 28th at 7:30 PM Central Daylight Time.  You can register for that here.